As a relationship coach with over 15 years of experience counseling couples, I’ve seen firsthand how a lack of mutual respect can erode the foundation of a marriage. Early on in my own marriage, I’ll admit that I was sometimes disrespectful to my husband without even realizing it. I now understand how essential it is for both partners to honor and appreciate each other.
After working with countless husbands and wives, I’ve discovered practical ways that women can make their men feel respected in the relationship. The simple methods not only affirm your spouse but also cultivate deeper intimacy and trust between you.
If you want to show your husband that you genuinely esteem him, here are 10 impactful ways to communicate respect:
1 Seek His Input and Advice
As your husband’s wife, you have the privilege of direct access to his way of thinking. Seeking his perspective demonstrates that you value his insight and gives him a voice in decisions that affect your lives together.
Whether it’s guidance about parenting, suggestions for a family vacation, or advice on a work dilemma you’re facing, asking for your husband’s input makes him feel respected as your partner. Even if you don’t always agree with his recommendations, you can still thank him sincerely for sharing his viewpoint.
2 Appreciate His Hard Work and Dedication
Providing for and protecting one’s family is a tremendous responsibility that most husbands take very seriously. Regardless of whether your husband works outside or inside the home, find ways to affirm his contributions to your household.
Maybe he handled a stressful work emergency, took the kids for a weekend to give you quiet time, or cleaned the bathrooms without being nagged. Whatever tasks or efforts stand out to you, offer him authentic praise and thanks. Your appreciation will reassure your husband that all his work and sacrifice doesn’t go unnoticed.
3 Support His Goals and Aspirations
Every person needs affirmation and encouragement to stay motivated toward achieving their dreams. As your husband’s greatest fan, you have the opportunity to inspire him as he strives for his goals.
Ask him about his current objectives, and listen intently when he shares his hopes for the future. Then reinforce your belief in him by reminding your husband of his strengths and talents whenever he faces obstacles. Your steadfast confidence will push him to keep pressing forward, even during tough seasons of chasing his aspirations.
4 Speak Highly of Him Publicly
As the old adage says, “Praise in public, criticize in private.” When you’re out together in social settings or talking with family, make it a point to talk up your husband’s admirable qualities and achievements. Recognition from his wife in front of others powerfully affirms his value and competence in that area.
Conversely, putting down or critiquing your husband publicly can deeply hurt his heart and embarrass him. If you do have concerns to address, have that hard conversation privately to maintain both his dignity and the integrity of your marriage.
5 Make Time to Connect with Thoughtful Questions
In the daily blur of responsibilities, it’s easy for spouses to lose meaningful connection with each other. Combat relational drift by carving out pockets of uninterrupted time to engage your husband in conversation.
Sit down together over coffee, go for regular walks alone, or cuddle in bed before falling asleep. Then ask open-ended questions that allow him to share freely, like “What was the highlight of your week?” or “What’s something new you’d like to try this year as a family?” Your genuine interest conveys that you value knowing the details of his inner world.
6 Accept His Unique Personality and Quirks
Because no human being is flawless, your husband will have certain ingrained tendencies or “quirks” that differ from yours. Instead of constantly criticizing every annoying habit, learn to graciously accept those idiosyncrasies as part of who your husband uniquely is.
Focus on recognizing his strengths, and bring up issues gently at appropriate times if certain behaviors feel hurtful or disrespectful to you. As the saying goes, “Husbands need to feel respected even more than they need to be loved.” Your unconditional acceptance provides a safe harbor for your man.
7 Take Responsibility for Mistakes and Apologize
Even with the best intentions, there will inevitably be times when you say or do something hurtful towards your husband. However, quickly acknowledging your fault and sincerely apologizing can repair trust and deepen mutual honor.
Resist attacking back or justifying your behavior when confronted. Instead, calmly admit where you were wrong along with expressing regret over wounding your husband. Ask forgiveness for the specific offense while validating how it must have made him feel. Reconciliation requires grace and humility from both people.
8 Thank Him for All He Contributes
Gratitude is an incredibly meaningful way to demonstrate respect because it affirms the value of your husband’s efforts. Though some contributions may seem mundane to you, regularly thanking your husband makes him feel noticed and appreciated.
Maybe he handled a clogged sink drain, brought you soup when you were sick, or played imagination games with your kids when you needed to rest. No act of service is too small for gratitude! Even a simple “thanks for…” with a warm hug or smile is enough to fill your man’s “respect tank” and inspire him to keep giving.
9 Refrain from Belittling Him
Because intimate partners know each other’s tender spots, it can be tempting to take a verbal jab if upset or irritated. However, mocking, teasing, or criticizing your husband harshly equates to contempt – one of the most lethal poisons for dissolving respect in marriage.
Derisive comments that attack his manhood, insult his family, or make him the butt of jokes undermine his sense of dignity. Instead, remind yourself regularly about qualities you admire in your husband to cultivate an honorable attitude towards him. Choose to build up rather than tear down with your words.
10 Admire Him for Making You and Your Family a Priority
Never take for granted that your husband works diligently and sacrifices to provide for your family. Though he may enjoy his job, he keeps pressing forward primarily out of love and responsibility for you, rather than just personal interest or ambition.
When you notice your husband denying himself or pushing through exhaustion to care for you and your children, tell him sincerely how much that means to you. Affirm that you notice and appreciate him devoting his time, energy and strength to protect and serve your family. Your admiration and praise will inspire him to persevere.
The Rewards of Respecting Your Husband
Practicing these respectful habits trains you to esteem your husband from a heart of sincerity. As you affirm his irreplaceable worth in your life, several beautiful fruits will emerge:
- Your emotional intimacy and friendship will deepen as your husband opens up more with a trusted confidante.
- He will feel more respected and engaged, unleashing his creative ideas and passions.
- Your husband will be motivated to reciprocate respect back to you and your children.
- He will have increased confidence to excel in reach his potential as a husband, father and leader.
The truth is, your husband needs to feel respected by you as much as loved. While it may not come naturally at first, making the conscious effort to honor your man in these meaningful ways will reap mutual blessings for you both in your marriage. When it comes to respect, the little things really do make a BIG difference!
